Women Recall Personal Stories of Times When Their Husbands Weaponized Incompetence

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elina lee
May 5, 2023 5:00 PM EDT

If there's one thing we can't stand as women, it's weaponized incompetence. Ironic, too, since we're the ones that enable it to happen. Let us paint a picture for you. We grew up in a household with just as many boys as there are girls. But for some apparent reason, it were the girls who were always helping with chores, taking care of the household, and so on. 

Why would that be, you may ask? Well, whenever our brothers were forced to help out, they would coincidentally do everything half a$$ or even worse, break and ruin things instead. So at one point or another, they'd just be asked to stop because it would be easier for the girls to do it rather than having to rely on our brothers. And that, friends, is the story of how we grew up in a s*xist household… but that's a story for another time lol. 

Today we're bringing you a Reddit thread filled with women sharing their personal experiences of witnessing weaponized incompetence firsthand. And, well, let's just say that almost all of these made our eyeballs twitch. We hope you enjoy this cringey ride! 

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  • 01
    Font - Posted by u/ohlookitsanonymous 3 days ago What's the worse case of weaponized incompetence that you've personally witnessed or experienced?
    via u/ohlookitsanonymous
  • 02
    Font - LyannaCeltiger88 3 days ago My ex husband told me on Friday that he couldn't pick our sons up from school because he doesn't know which school they go to.. T 1.0k Reply Share
    via u/LyannaCeltiger88

    This… this is sad 

  • 03
    Font - Didyoufartjustthere 3 days ago. edited 3 days ago Overheard two people making small talk outside the crèche. Girl: Is your little one starting school this year Guy: I wouldn't know
    via u/Didyoufartjustthere

    What's up with dads not knowing anything about their children? Time to start putting in effort fellas. 

  • 04
    Font - 1955photo 3 days ago My FORMER boyfriend who couldn't put sheets on the bed correctly, and acted like he had never seen how a fitted sheet was supposed to look. He also gave up when the pillowcase got twisted because he just stuffed the pillow in it.
    via u/1955photo
  • 05
    Font - fangedguyssuck. 3 days ago I've shared this before but I was briefly married in my early 20s to a man who kept insisting he didn't know how to do the laundry. We lived in an apartment and had to use the laundry mat, and I figured we could just trade off on laundry days.
    via u/fangedguyssuck
  • 06
    Font - He insisted he didn't know when to use bleach. I said only when you have an all white clothes load. Otherwise just don't worry about it. Asshole would constantly come back with bleach stained clothes....and not only that but mysteriously only my clothes would have the bleach stains on them. Always with the apology of, "its confusing".
    via u/fangedguyssuck
  • 07
    Font - We were married for about a year before I'd had enough. He wanted a mommy he could sleep with.
    via u/fangedguyssuck
  • 08
    Font - pbd1996 3 days ago My brother has a high IQ, went to mechanic school, started his own business, sells solar, grows his own pot plants, goes on hikes in the mountains solo, obtained a gun license, and made smart investments in Tesla years ago.
    via u/pbd1996
  • 09
    Font - However, he acts incompetent so my mom makes his doctors appointments for him and brings him to the appointments. She also picks up any medications or toiletry products he needs from CVS for him. My dad does all of his laundry and puts it away, does all of his dishes, takes all of his trash out, and pays for all of his bills.
    via u/pbd1996
  • 10
    Font - When my brother has a problem with his car, my dad makes an appointment with a mechanic, brings my brother's car in for him, and then takes an Uber back. My brother is the smartest person I know, and yet, my parents treat him like he's an incompetent child.
    via u/pbd1996
  • 11
    Font - Newtonz5thLaw 3 days ago Oh man. Went on a trip to Costa Rica. It was my mom's boyfriend's family vacation, so I didn't really know anyone. I find out that one relative named Taylor is a travel agent and booked the whole trip.
    via u/Newtonz5thLaw
  • 12
    Font - On the morning of the flight, Taylor shows up to the airport and says her husband just LOST his passport. That she had been up all night trying to find it with no luck. Eventually she had to say "okay, we're going without you" and she now has to travel with 4 kids to Costa Rica without her husband.
    via u/Newtonz5thLaw
  • 13
    Font - Dude finds his passport in his fucking sock drawer 4 days later. He makes the 18 hour trip to Costa Rica to spend 1.5 days with us, then make the 18 hour trip back. Dude had a terrible attitude the whole time, too. I was blown away. I don't know what I would do if my husband pulled that shit.
    via u/Newtonz5thLaw
  • 14
    Font - desertcoyoteazul. 3 days ago. edited 3 days ago My ex would just leave his dirty clothes next to the laundry basket. Literally on the floor right next to it! He knew what he was doing and wanted the satisfaction of me having to pick up after him.
    via u/desertcoyoteazul
  • 15
    Font - tomatogrey 3 days ago My bil in 46 and lives with mil. Mil has health and memory issues. She needs very basic help around the house, reminders to take meds, light cleaning, drive to apts, etc. He just can't do it. He hasn't worked for years, lives off her pension. My fam moved accross the country to help her, and bil can't even do the dishes.
    via u/tomatogrey
  • 16
    Font - stellacdy. 3 days ago Had an ex who couldn't make himself a cup of coffee. Tried to teach him, and he would run out of the room because he "couldn't handle it." It was coffee regular or with milk and sugar.
    via u/stellacdy
  • 17
    Font - becabaro 3 days ago My dad. My mom cooks him breakfast, lunch and dinner every single day. Whenever she's not home, he tries to make her feel bad by not eating anything. He can't even make himself a damn toast!
    via u/becabaro
  • 18
    Font - hummingbirdsNwhiskey 3 days ago I asked my husband the other week to put the rug back in front of the kitchen sink that I washed. He threw it down crooked with a corner bunched up. When I pointed it out he said "what? You're being so ocd." Like no dude.
    via u/hummingbirdsNwhiskey
  • 19
    Font - SpinachTart 3 days ago Friendly reminder that the only response you should ever give to this BS is "figure it out." No hand holding, no teaching/coaching, nothing. They have a knowledge source vaster than the library of Alexandria in their pocket. THEY CAN FIGURE IT OUT.
    via u/SpinachTart

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marriage-stories toxic relationships marriage wives husbands relationships incompetence stories weaponized
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